The Forbidden Experience

Warning: This is not to discriminate or point out something, I just want you to be vigilant while you think it is too safe out there in general.

I went out yesterday (10/22/1987), My birthday, to go to church to spend some time with God and pray. Actually, this was the first time I went out alone and ride a taxi. I felt really different at that day when I woke up that’s why I wanted to meditate and pray and I even posted it on facebook that “I felt like I was a stranger in my Life”.

Well, when I arrived at Ruwi Roundabout to ride a taxi on my way to Oman Oil(where Christian churches are located), I saw a taxi and I suddenly signaled to get in. I told him: “Oman Oil”, he said: “ok”. I was already inside the taxi and take note, I took the front seat and I am all alone. At first, I didn’t actually mind being alone and I was so blunt to feel the atmosphere inside. Suddenly, the driver asked me if I was a Filipino, I told him instead of saying YES, I told him I’m Chinese. I am mixed with Chinese blood so, that’s it. This is where the thrilling part of the story starts. He(taxi driver), out of nowhere, said: “ I want you”. I was shocked and my feet were trembling. I told him a BIG NO, of course. He said: “ Don’t be afraid”. I told him, “I am not. It is just that I am not like that and I’m not what you think I am”. He touched my hair which gives me goosebumps and I am starting to get irritated. I told the driver to stop the taxi and that I wanted to pull-over and I even gave him the money(fare). He insisted not to because I still didn’t reach my destination and he doesn’t want my money either. I thanked him. Right ahead of us,a local signaled to ride with us and I was glad because he did. Everything was so quiet inside the car and I wanted to get out at that moment but my feet aren’t moving as well. When I reached my destination, I pulled-over and got out of the car. He didn’t go. He was waiting for my fare, he asked for it so, I gave the money right away with no further rebuttles even if he insisted at the first place that he doesn’t need my money. He was angry and what’s worst was he said this line: “YOU WANT O**** BANANA? YOU WANT O**** SAMBUL?  The latter pertains to the word “PENIS” in English.

Do you know how rude that was? It felt like someone just slapped me with a baseball bat on my face. That was so rude and I was so insulted. It felt like someone punched a hole inside my chest, like a bullet just hit me in the chest. I mean, I was already oriented at the event that there will be people who are like that here. Of course, rude people and rudeness is always there wherever you will go. You just have to accept it and flick it (a statement that was said by my Aunt). I know, It’s just I didn’t see it coming and I was caught off guard. I wasn’t prepared at the incident it happened.  Seriously, am I hearing that on the day of my birthday??(A question I hurriedly thought of) They’ve got to be kidding me. I was petrified and I was shaking a little bit but I handled it very well. It is so hard that you get to encounter people who are like that. I mean, I’m not saying all of them are like that, there are still kind people here who showed so much respect to expats especially Filipinos but for every 10% of the population, I guess there will always be at least 2% who are rude. You know, it goes to everybody as  the saying goes: RESPECT BEGETS RESPECT. No matter what they are, who they are, where they come from, regardless of race, religion, nationality and creed, one should respect the otherJ

Moral Lesson:

         Don’t ever ride a taxi all by yourself next time even if you are confident enough and It’s for your own safety and protection as well.

Buena note!

eric

Oma-coma

     There comes a point in my life where everything seems to be constant. Every routine I have is the same routine I have since I landed in this foreign country. Wake up, sleep, eat, net, mingle, cook, and work has been keeping me busy all day and you know how bitter that is? I don’t know but everything is the same, I mean nothing seems to be unusual. Unlike when I was still in the Philippines, I could visit three houses in one day and end up my night by unplanned drinking or eating out with some friends but here, it seems to be so boring with nothing to do. I am so fed up with hearing the same stuffs and dramas. I wanna do something that would make my OMACOMA life be in track again and lighten up. I wanna keep my life as if it was burning. Full of surprises, fun, and enjoyment and something that would make me relax and rest. “Same routine and same Management”  is that’s all what it is. I woke up one day with no appetite for delicious foods nor do I know what to do anymore with my priorities. Do you know how awful that is?  It’s as if I’m a stranger in my own life right now. This is not me. I need to wake up from this nightmare cause it’s driving me nuts. I adamantly wanted to do the same thing way back in the Philippines, my life was hellavah fun. This may sound a little bit scrutinizing but it’s true that I’m making no life here at all. I mean, I’m earning good, I’m leaving in a good but not better house and I think I’m okay with this rather than having to have not at all. I don’t even know if I do have Friends, I don’t know if I’m just sugar coating of what I’m feeling here being far away from home. It seems to be so unreal to me. Everything was so fast, it changed suddenly and when I look back, there’s nothing left but memories of what I had. I know I still have handful of friends to go back to at home but I mean, it will never be the same. A lot of changes happened in a short span of time. Some left, some resigned, some got married, and some disappeared. I wonder what is going out there. I missed my life badly, my unplanned activities which turned out to be bombastic.

     I will give myself more time to adjust, more time to explore, more acquaintances, more socialization, and more life I should say. Maybe, I just lack the drive to get on track again. So, I better have a self-check again. Hahaha. When will I ever laugh really well again? I think if there’s something that is so funny. Hahays! You just don’t know how I badly missed PhilippinesL

In-sha-allah! I will pass this stage and if that happens, I’m going to make life like a roller coaster again.

Salute!

eric

INSIGHTS

     I took this picture few days ago and when I was about to delete this, it made me think about something deeper. A picture so simple yet it shows nice meaning.  Just by looking at it, it symbolizes greater than by telling that it is a post lamp with three lights on it, very simple and it is non-sensical to take something like this. It is dark, boring, and nothing to be amaze of but when you look deeper, you’ll see something else. In our life, we need light to guide us in times of troubles; we need it to show us the right direction, the right thing to do and the right decisions to make. If we encountered problems that we thought we can’t handle, we always tend to ask ourselves, God why us?  Yet, we forget to ask God Why us when we received so much graces and blessings from him. Isn’t it ironic that we ask too much yet we forget simple word to say, THANK YOU?? We have disregarded that there are millions of people out there who are unfortunate enough not to experience what we have now and what we earn and yet, we just ditch off things so simple on us but means big things for them. We always complain about something yet we never see that there are people who don’t even have a single penny to spend? So much complaints and no contentment at all. That’s why people were never happy.

I came to see reality as what someone told me recently and here are those:

EAT- To never complain of what we have on our bounty table. Enjoying it makes it more delicious because millions of people are dying to have those.

PRAY- to never forget that there is someone out there watching you day by day. To say simple words like, THANK YOU for the things he provided us especially the roof over our head, PLEASE for asking him sincerely about something you wanted to have, EXCUSE ME for stuffs you never meant to do, AND SORRY for all the things you did knowingly and unknowingly. These words are so simple yet give great impact to someone hearing it.

LOVE- I don’t know if this fits me saying things like this: “TO BELIEVE IN LOVE AGAIN”. I almost give up about this phrase a long time ago but it doesn’t feel right at all. I was afraid that If I may pursue what I felt, I may lose my balance and if I lose it I may lose everything what I have. To never close your door to someone be it a friend or a stranger because love gives everything: happiness, sadness, tears and etc. It is a force of nature governed by physics. It’s like searching for love again despite rejection. And with every love comes contentment. That’s being honest.

FAMILY AND FRIENDS- these are the people who you can’t afford to lose. These people will always be there for you no matter what happened. They’re your support system and whatever goes wrong, there will still be a lot of shoulders to lean on. FRIENDS, real friends tell you something wrong and what you’re doing is not right. FAKE FRIENDS tells you that even what you’re wearing looks really horrible on you; they still say you are pretty. Damn right! Don’t forget, by reading this you still have a dried up saliva near your mouth.lol!

If you leave something that is comforting and familiar on you, and if you are prepared with everything that lies ahead then, the truth will not be withheld from you.

AdomaniJ

eric

Here I go again

Just to warn you, I am not going to say this in detail. 

Two days ago, I messaged a friend (Irene) in facebook telling her that I am screwed over something I’m feeling of recently which I am through with few years ago. I told her that I’ve been such a dumb to let everything happened again for no reason at all. I told her that I am confused with what to do and with I’m going through right now. Well, she was actually nice when she made an advice, kinda cruel but friendly at the same time. If it was loida, I could have hear her telling me all the hurtful stuffs that would make me realize how stupid I am and it helps, that’s why I love her so much. Anyways, I have this over and over again and yet I do not learn every single thing of it. I wanted to stay away from it but every time I try to, it always comes near me and I’m always teased about this one. Every single thought about it makes me puke and the only solution is to stop. She(Irene) told me to inquire why it happened or it didn’t mean anything at all. To never be a coward and just ask because it’s not fun at all but I have no guts. I was never a quitter, I was always a goer with everything I do but now, I guess I have to stop and move on or i might need to move on because i'm afraid that I might be destroyed if I don't.

There were things I wanted to ask but I just can’t and I try to let it be. The same story is happening now that happened to me 4 years ago and I even recall it once in a blue moon. Every bit of it was not enjoyable at all. I realize my life is not chaotic, it’s all that is attached to it that burns me. Moving on was a great option and I had to take its word for it. It’s like there is sweetness in doing nothing. Everytime I see that person’s face, I hear dolphins clapping.hahah! It’s a nerving to know a complete stranger yet you are falling. Irene said, to let it all go and just be happy. Maybe, I’m too charming to be fun of.nyahahah!!!

Well, seriously, I don’t know if there’s a cure for this but if there is, can you give me one? I’m dying to let it go but it is too hard. I am just happy that I have friends who I can count on to every time and who let me see how great  life is and all that comes with itJ

Buena note.

ericderey

F.R.I.E.N.D.S.

     Everything started with a doubt, with the saying “first impression last”. Some pretend to be really nice, some would even use you for money, some may be so blunt affect but when you turn your back at them that’s where the terrible things happen. In this world, some people change, some friends may leave but life does not have to stop for anybody. And change is the only constant things in this world.

     My Life is surrounded mostly with pretty and lovely girls and I find it very lucky to be surrounded by beautiful and lovely girls and it felt very good.. I do have boy-friends too but they were outnumbered by my sweet gorgeous ladies. Well, I guess that’s meant to be and you know what I mean. hahaha! They are different women in my Life who made significant changes of me as a person. They inspired me to become what I am now. I’ve known them for so many years while I was in my college and high school years. They have built a strong trust on my end and they have showed goodness to me. Gifted with beauty and brains, a perfect package to be exact.  Few have sense of humor, some have barely talented skills, some are so pretty like mouth-watering ice cream and some are plainly stupid yet mixed with intelligence and beauty,lol.

     I treasure them so much in my life because without them, I am plainly nothing. I owe them several things and several days of countless beers and dinner out. I just love them how they run a party(night out), how they spend and show their love, affection, and concern for each other. I have screw up a lot of time but they were still there for me. And I am thankful for that, for the support when I was totally down and to spend a night with me when I am always happy. Life could end there instantly but with them, it shows no end. They are my never ending "Alice In Wonderland".

     I can say that thank you will never be enough to say. It might be an endless rockefeller road with them and an everlasting journey to party and friendship. I call them my soulmates, my bestfriends, my sisters, and my girl-friends. I just can't imagine my life without you. Cheers to the next 50 guys:)


moi,

ericderey

Mother of All

     Ever since our big family gone up really big, My Great Grandmother, mothered 8 offsprings namely: Lizinka, Ophelia, Wilbur, Edwin, Manuel, Jojo, Grace, James (they call it lucky 8,hehehe). Well, I guess that’s what I know of. Aside from the fact that Life before was so hard and was very difficult, they raised them all together at the same time with her late husband-- Dicoroso Sr, who was once an influential man (A very Good Teacher) before he passed away,--burning  up their asses just to raise 8 children and feed them up on their tables fully. And they were all lucky they’ve survived everything with each other’s hand.

     

     My Great Grandmother, Francisca (pronounced as FRANCHESKA) Gelsana, was one of the hard-working persons I’ve known in my entire life. She was really a Woman full of Love for work, to her family, to her friends, and husband. I was unfortunate enough not to witness the old times when they have to plow to eat, to persevere to have money and to work to survive. And I know it wasn’t an easy task but they both did a good job. She made her all children Professionals, got a Bachelors Degree and worked somewhere now. Damn! She was one of a Lady. Hell to the NO! She was really pretty when she was my age that’s why her husband was captivated by her eyes. I cannot imagine how she able to survive it raising 8 lovely sons and daughters by her own was never a joke. Like, duh! I know Lolo was there but I mean, mother’s care is different, right? I could rather think of thousand baby cries, smashing vases and naughty kiddos but I think it was totally different before. Kids were actually taught to help the kitchen, study, do the laundry, Clean the house, and etc..I meant it the old way not the modern way,lol.  Lola was a great cook as well. She cooked a lot of things like what my Grandmother used to say “ Sus, imo lola kikay(nickname) dong kay grabe kaayo na mo luto.  Maayo mo luto og biko(sweetened rice covered with banana leaf), ampao og unsa pana diha”, that’s where I learnt how to cook because of her, as quoted by my Grandma. hahahay, funny old memories.hehehe

     

     To be honest, I treat myself as unlucky, I should say because I wasn’t there. I was not there when and how my Grandparents were brought up and how they managed to get up on their own feet.  I am so proud to have her beside me every single of the day at home. She was so funny and she has always been the  Hardworking, Caring, Loving, Understanding, and most of all, she always smiles. Sad to know, she’s never been the same of course. Everything has to deteriorate, ryt? “Kung sa bisaya pa, magbag.o ang tanan inig ka tiguwang nimo”. Everything has to change and change is the only constant thing in this world. I am just so proud of her and I cannot express how happy I am to have known and have someone like you Lola. And I never got the chance to say how THANKFUL I AM FOR EVERYTHING YOU HAVE DONE FOR US, FOR OUR FAMILY. We will never be the person we are now if it wouldn’t because of your perseverance and dreams. In behalf of our families, Thank you so much . You taught me a lot of things in your own little way and I totally appreciate it. You may never see and know it but I am.

I missed you Lola Kikay, I missed everything about you. I missed bickering and laughing with youL

 Just to let you know, I am your greatest fan and you are my Idol. And I will always be.

Now and Forever:)

Moi,

ericderey:)

Only Girl in the World

     I don't know how to describe you as you yourself because there is no word enough to describe how you are to me. I mean, a word doesn't fit every single detail that describes you because you are special to me. When I left, what comes to my mind was your reaction at the airport aside seeing my mom and brother cried for me, I saw yours. That was one of the painful memories that I cannot forget. What hurts the most was, you were trying to hold it up and not cry which actually worked. Just don't wanna think about it. On the other hand...

                    "I missed you so much! Every single day".

     Everytime weekends come, my mind always remember what we usually do. It was countless beers, nightouts, parties, talks, and movies we had together. I missed us. I missed talking with you over something which lasted for a night--sensical or nonsense. I missed going out with you and have coffee and laughing about something stupid we did or you did. hahaha..memories:(

     You are the only person I have who I can be myself. No secrets and everything is so much real when we are together like no restraints and limitations. We both know we have a lot of friends but it's so different when we are both together--Remember? "WE DON'T  HAVE COMFORT ZONES ANYMORE",hahahahaha. "Kung sa imo blog pa, "Mabuhi ra ta kita ra duha. Malingaw ra ta. Wala pay arte, wala pa'y problema."---- You and Me, Just us Two".

     You actually know that your temper annoys me but I sucked it Up! lol. I didn't notice that that is one of the things I missed about you, a trademark to be exact. You have been a sister to me, you were and still is my partner in crime, my bestfriend, my buddy, my girl-friend, and my cousin. We know each other so much that even silence can't break it off. We have been so familiar with each other that we understand each others problems. Even if we were beside each other overnight and never talk, we could still hear each others thoughts. Kay dili man bungol,hahahah.

I just missed you so much. This is what it is all about. You may have your own decisions and path to take, we both know that we still have a point of intersection in our lives that we
 meet and sit by each other's side.Who knows, that time is just along the corner;-D

We might not have the perfect world but when we are together, everything is just perfect--JUST US TWO :0



moi,

ericderey:)